"i must leave after all"

i'm considering going to a different church.

seriously, how am i supposed to be around you? i've spent my whole life carefully constructing behavioral patterns and schema that help me navigate my social environment. i even committed to loving people-- not just because it's right, but because that conquers the uncertainty. it says, "you don't have to be charismatic or likeable. just love people."

you ruin everything i've constructed to keep me comfortable and safe. you are le dangereux, and i have absolutely no clue how i can continue in friendship with you, especially after these things are revealed to you.