"is this okay?"

you're in a good mood today. and your hair looks extra good. and your voice and your eyes and your thoughts and your laugh and Dayyyaaanicaaa.

eff. my. life.

the sermon today echoes so much of what i rambled about at BF yesterday. i the song we sing says "You make all things work together for my good." in a different situation i'd not misinterpret that line; in fact i would critique most interpretations of it. today i just want to claim it and take advanteege of it.

sooooo you just finished re-de-odorizing, and i hate you right now because you jokingly invited me to look beneath your outer garment, and that's just cruel. i already find you a challenge not to stare at. geez... "is this okay?" ?!?!?! no, Danica, it's dangerously alluring. thanks though.

perhaps it is my fault for the way i joke with you (and Jerad). we joke about boobs and fajitas... why would i expect you to be sensitive to my vulnerability to your body?

i think i will have to email you about it. i don't want to evoke feelings of shame or guilt, but this must be done.

if i find later that you WERE aware of my feelings for you at the time of this incident, there will need to be a reckoning of some kind.

jerk.